We continue our series on Aging as a team sport…in this episode, we highlight the family as a core member of that team and some critical conversations to have 1:1 during the quiet moments of your Thanksgiving holiday. Top tip! Spread these conversations out during your whole visit as having them all at once can be overwhelming for everyone involved.

As a part of the family team, using the touch point of Thanksgiving is an ideal time for crucial conversations with older parents. These are not conversations to take all at once, think of creative ways to divide this amongst your siblings and family members during quiet moments, like while you are preparing meals, watching TV, taking walks.

First, discuss health matters, addressing any concerns or recent changes. How’s it going, do you notice a decline in general health and wellbeing? Take note of this and observe everything you can that comes up as you interact with each other.

Second, explore their living situation, ensuring it aligns with their needs and is safe. As you walk around your Older’s dwelling do you notice anything that is of concern in the environment? Any major repairs to be done or any risks to be addressed that you can make an action plan for? If your loved one still drives, check in on how it’s going. If not, check in on safe transport options that you can support them with.

Third, delicately touch on finance. This could be a no go area for many families. The goal here is to have the conversations in the good times before crisis strikes so that you and your family members can gain an understanding of resources that are available for potential future care.

Fourth, check in on their emotional well-being. Are you noticing feelings of loneliness or anxiety? Ask about their social schedule and how they are filling their time to keep serving their aspirations and big life purpose. How can you support them in continuing engagement with your family and their community?

Fifth, discuss future plans and preferences in case there is a change in their health and they need extra assistance. Do they want to stay in their home? How much support would they accept if you could offer more support to enable them to live at home longer? What are the conditions that would require them to move to a new home? What level of support would they like to receive from the family?

Open and honest dialogues during Thanksgiving can foster understanding, strengthen family bonds, and ensure that aging parents receive the support and care they deserve.

Let us know your experiences in your team, share your insights at [email protected].